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WHEN exactly is mid-life?? Between 40 and 60? Some time after 30 and before 70? WHAT precisely is middle-age? At Neat Women Inc, only one person can answer those questions-YOU! The real certainty is that Fifty’s FINE. You need not look far in cyberspace to find evidence of the joys of traveling on the Fifties Freeway! Neat Women Inc offers a map for easy navigation. Enjoy the sites!

"We do not change as we grow older; we just become more clearly ourselves." Lynn Hall You could begin with a look at a “real world” group of women who have declared their specialness! To wit:
Our Statement of Purpose The Red Hat Society began as a result of a few women deciding to greet middle age with verve, humor, and elan. We believe silliness is the comedy relief of life, and, since we are all in it together, we might as well join red-gloved hands and go for the gusto together. Underneath the frivolity, we share a bond of affection, forged by common life experiences and a genuine enthusiasm for wherever life takes us next.

Click Here Works for us!

Perhaps purple and red don’t suit you….not to worry-there are so many options today. For example:

For baby boomers who want to go back in time! If you have an interest in the

40's, [remember the old party lines?]

50's, [how about saddle shoes and jukeboxes?]

60's [mini skirts and Elvis]

and 70's, [did you own a pet rock?]

dance (jitterbug) right over to this location--Featured Retro Nostalgic Theme Sites!
Click Here

Like it or not, there is one feature of 50 that we sometimes find annoying, uncomfortable, but unavoidable….MEN O PAUSE. We think the best approach is laughter and with that in mind, offer these sites to tickle your funny bone.

Menopause The Musical - The Hilarious Celebration of Women and The Change...on the boards in Florida and preparing for a national tour! Click Here

Menopause Angel - An angel pattern that helps a woman's symptoms of menopause. She holds accessories that are explained in a poem, which is included in the pattern! Easy and funny! Click Here

This might be an appropriate time to PAUSE and give yourself a great big Ego Booster - It will give you a lift and probably a great big smile! What more could you ask for? Click Here

A neat woman who believes Fifty Is FINE, sent us her journal entries to illustrate how much laughter helps!

Chapter 1: I Now It All Makes Sense

MEN tal illness
MEN strual cramps
MEN tal breakdown
MEN opause
GUY necologist.............

and when we have real trouble, it's a HIS terectomy.
Ever notice how all of women's problems start with men?

Chapter 2: SIGNS OF MENOPAUSE

You sell your home heating system at a yard sale.
Your husband jokes that instead of buying a wood stove, he is using you to heat the family room this winter. Rather than just saying you are not amused, you shoot him.
You have to write post-it notes with your kids' names on them.
The Phenobarbital dose that wiped out the Heaven's Gate Cult gives you four hours of decent rest.
You change your underwear after every sneeze.
You're on so much estrogen that you take your Brownie troop on a field trip to Chippendale's.

Chapter 3: SIGNS OF WEAR

Your sweetie says, "Let's go upstairs and make love," and you answer "Pick one, I can't do both!"
Your friends compliment you on your new alligator shoes when you're barefoot.
A cute guy catches your eye and your pacemaker opens the garage door.
Going bra-less pulls all the wrinkles out of your face.
You don't care where your spouse goes, just as long as you don't have to go along.
You are cautioned to slow down by the doctor instead of by the police.
"Getting a little action" means you don't need to take any fiber today.
"Getting lucky" means you find your car in the parking lot.
An "all-nighter" means not getting up to go to the potty.

Chapter 4: Never Underestimate the Power of a Woman.

There were 11 people hanging onto a rope that came down from a helicopter. Ten were men and one woman. They all decided that one person should get off because if they didn't the rope would break and everyone would die. No one could decide who should go so finally the woman gave a really touching speech saying how she would give up her life to save the others, because women were used to giving up things for their husbands and children, giving in to men, and not receiving anything in return. When she finished speaking, all the men started clapping.
REPEAT: Never Underestimate the Power of a Woman….YOUR POWER!

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Be sure to read Fifty's Funny or Fabulous Fifty's soon!

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